VISIONS OF A ROBOT DREAM - Part 2

VISIONS OF A ROBOT DREAM - Part 2
My last entry introduced the topic of "Hybrots" (I personally like to call them "Biobots"). For people who are completely unfamiliar with this unfamiliar term, "Hybrots" describe a robotic system that is coupled with an incubated unit for housing a neuron cell culture. This cell culture acts as the brain for the entire robotic system. "Training" these cell cultures enable it to react to certain scenarios in specific ways. The bond between the system developer and the neural network is akin to the relationship between a parent and a baby. Currently, because of the life span of the cell culture (close to 2-3 years), a saturation point is attained beyond which no more "training" can take place, but I strongly believe that within the end of the next decade this hassle will cease to exist. How? You may ask. This question warrants a whole new entry (which I will be glad to discuss about later), but for now lets just assume that advances in bio-technology and robotics allow for the creation and existence of these "Hybrots".

I strongly feel that if robotists ever were to create a robot with intelligence that mirrors our own then it would definitely be one with living brain cell, most likely human. I could never imagine any piece of integrated circuitry reverse engineered to map the functions of the human brain, the most complex processor known to man. Mankind isint far from witnessing a society peppered with Hybrots, co-existing with humanity, helping it to grease its gears. Which brings us back the question that I put forth in my previous entry: "Should these Hybrots be considered living entities?"

There will be some who might asseverate Hybrots as living entities without any hesitation. There will also be some (the obvious skeptics) who might claim that Hybrots can be only be considered a living entity when they attain a state of consciousness. Now, what is consciousness? Consciousness in robotics is a relative state of mind that makes a robot self-aware. A conscious robot is supposed to comprise of attributes such as a sense of place, imagination, directed attention, planning, decision and emotion. Programming the various attributes mentioned above into a robotic system would indeed be an exacting task but imbibing the necessary qualities for a robot to possess emotion and imagination is Herculian in nature. Sadly, at present, the research surrounding these attributes lies vastly in theory, however, it's practical implementations has just witnessed its genesis last decade.

This entry is filled with assumptions galore, so it doesn't adversely affect us if we throw in one more. Let us consider the possibility that some brilliant mind in the future comes up with a design for implementing emotions and imagination into a Hybrot. This would not only make the Hybrot a conscious sentient being but would also win the inventor a Nobel prize that year (i.e if Alfred Nobel still has funds in his savings account). Even after this there will be some who would just refuse to treat Hybrots as living beings. They could always argue that consciousness is a relative term and even if a robot is self-aware, without a moral and ethical foundation it cannot be considered a living entity. Stubborn but a very interesting point nonetheless.

The only way for a robot to possess moral or ethical values is by making it three laws safe. Of course by three laws I meant the one and only, (actually three and only..pardon my flaccid flippancy with words) three laws of Robotics by Isaac Asimov. In accordance with Wikipedia, "the Three Laws of Robotics are a set of three rules written by Isaac Asimov, which almost all positronic robots appearing in his fiction must obey. Introduced in his 1942 short story "Runaround", although foreshadowed in a few earlier stories, the Laws state the following:

1. A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm.
2. A robot must obey orders given to it by human beings except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.
3. A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Law."

Even though these laws were meant to be ethical guidelines instead of rules to be followed during the engineering process involving the development of a robot, till this date they are still considered to be the pioneering laws of robotics. It's my belief that these laws would stand the test of time (and possibly be implemented in all Hybrots in the near future?). A first glance at these laws reveal to the reader the ideal characteristics of an epitome citizen. So mankind can be assured that a Hybrot which is manufactured "three laws safe" could be considered a citizen of the society as it supplants its own safekeeping with the safety of the humans around him. It is only natural that a Hybrot be considered a living entity when he surpasses an average human on moral standards.

However, a second glance at these laws would reveal to the reader a myriad of loopholes that could be best described as a programmer's nightmare. So are these Hybrots that are "three laws safe", actually "three laws safe"? Using the same lame excuse from last blog, I shall discuss how safe the three laws actually are in my next blog. Until then I shall bid thee avid reader, a big adieu.



Transmission complete - Amrith

{I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die. - Roy Batty}

VISIONS OF A ROBOT DREAM - Part 1

VISIONS OF A ROBOT DREAM - Part 1
Hi everybody!! After a humongous hiatus, I am back to blogging this summer. Long gone are those days of movie based blogs. I strongly feel that there are a lot more unimportant but pressing issues that could be expressed here. This doesn't mean that I shall not be covering movies any longer, it just means that I have adjusted my field of vision for a more panoramic view.

Currently, I have been actively interested in neural networks. Just to refresh your memory, neurons are electrically excitable cells in the nervous system whose main function is to process and transmit information. Neurons are typically composed of three main parts: a soma, or cell body, a dendritic tree and an axon. Every neuron is an open-loop control system by itself, where the neuron receives input via its soma or dendritic tree and provides an output via the axon. An area of intense research is not just to understand the properties of an individual neuron but also to understand how millions of neurons interact with one another to realize intelligent systems.

Recent research has explored using cultures of neurons as computing devices. One device used to study biological neural networks is a Multi-Electrode Array (MEA): “a specialized tissue culture dish in which living neurons can be grown over multiple stimulation and recording electrodes”. These electrodes enable recording signals generated by the neuron cell culture and also provide a means to stimulate the cell culture. In order to “train” these cultures, a system to measure and stimulate culture electrical activity is needed. After “training” the neuron cell culture, fusing it with various control system techniques can make it act as the “brain” of an engineered system.

With some imagination, anybody can easily see the scope of the field and its unmistakable connection with the positronic brain. For the uninformed Wikipedia quotes, "a positronic brain is a fictional technological device, originally conceived by science fiction writer Isaac Asimov. Its role is to serve as a central computer for a robot, and, in some unspecified way, to provide it with a form of consciousness recognizable to humans. When Asimov wrote his first robot stories in 1939/1940, the positron was a newly discovered particle and so the buzz word positronic, coined by analogy with electronic, added a contemporary gloss of popular science to the concept."

Being an avid reader of Isaac Asimov, I wonder whether he ever considered his positronic brain to be biological in nature. Because in case we do succeed in developing a fully functional neural network to act as a brain for an engineering system, aren't we creating a new biological entity? The birth of a new species? Fused with robotics, could this lead to the development of robots that Asimov conceived in his books? Though the research in the field of neural networks is relatively in its infancy, if neural networks could be trained to perform complex tasks then the answer to the above questions would definitely be a "yes". This obviously raises many questions on the social impact of this research but most importantly this one: "If these bio-electro-mechanical entities ever come to exist, should they be given their own rights?"

Vehemently adhering to the nature of a blog and from the fear of turning this entry into a lecture, I shall address the issues of "robot rights" in tomorrow's blog. Until then I shall leave these issues for you to ponder over the night.

Transmission complete - Amrith

SPIDERMAN 3 TRAILER OUT

SPIDERMAN 3
The highly anticipated Spiderman 3's teaser trailer is finally out. And it couldnt have come out at a better time. With all the superhero hype in the air with Superman Returns, I am sure the trailer is going to be raved about on the net for days. I sure hope to see it during today's screening of Superman Returns. Sporting a plethora of villians like the Venom, Sandman and the Goblin, it's indeed surprising that the focus is still on the main character. Something the previous Batman movies lacked completely - a spotlight on the caped crusader. I still congratulate the fact that the filmmakers managed to rope in new ideas and present even larger problems for Spidey to handle.

The Red's gone and the all new black suit's the new fashion trend for this spidey. The idea of fighting with one's dark side may be new to the Spiderman franchise but is it fresh? Even though the 1 min and 37 second trailer looks classy, giving the Spiderman franchise the much needed darker edge, the concept sounds eerily familiar. With very little thought, the last installment of the sands trilogy, Prince of Persia: The Two Thrones, pops into mind. Here we deal with a Prince who has been tainted by the sands of time lending him a darker side that keeps resurfacing whenever an extra hand is needed. In the end the prince ends up fighting his alter ego to save himself from schizophrenia, split personality or whatever you may choose to call it. Duality has always existed in every superhero movie, comprising of the normal guy and his or her alter ego but lending a superhero multiple personalities is still somewhat of an unexplored territory. A darkside for a superhero has always worked - the reason why Batman outdoes all other superheros in comic sales every year. And this time I think it should definately work for Spiderman too.

Anyway here is the trailer's link. Enjoy it normally or with the H.264 HD codec, your choice.

Spiderman 3's Trailers

BTW : You can download the qool Spidey 3 wallpaper that I managed to photoshop by clicking on the first picture or a Spidey 2 wallpaper by clicking on the last.
- {BATMAN^V^EXILED}

THE DAY SUPERMAN RETURNS

SUPERMAN RETURNS
Today is the 28th of June and after a long wait of 19 years, The man steel finally returns to the big screen. I intially had the idea of previewing the movie before I watched it. But previewing it could only mean one thing - a little research on my part about the film's background. So I chose not to. I vivdly remember, during the June of 2005, I read so many reviews and participated in so many forums that I knew every scene in Batman Begins before I saw the movie for the first time. I even stumbled across the script for the movie but I refrained from reading it. I had spoilt my movie watching experience enough and didnt want to spoil it even further. But Begins was such a great film it still managed to overshoot my expectations and managed to set standards for every other superhero movie to come.

Superman has always has a wider appeal when compared to Batman, Batman solely focusing on people drawn towards Angst, Vengeance and Retribution. Superman on the other hand stands for everything else that Batman doesnt symbolize. When Batman is as dark as the Knight itself, Superman is as bright as the sun. Batman and superman are like two sides of the same coin. Opposites when it comes to characteristics and tactics but when together, they complete each other. So it would be a shame trying to compare both these movies. Hence it would be much better to compare Superman Returns with the likes of Spiderman because of the similar audience appeal they possess. I liked Spiderman 2, liked it enough to watch it four times in theatre. Not as great as Batman Begins but a good movie nevertheless. I would feel really happy if Superman Returns came close to the likes of Spiderman 2. I have a lot of faith in the director, Bryan Singer (X-Men, X2, The Usual suspects) to deliver a good superhero movie because of his previous experiences in the field. But I still remain skeptical about the movie. Probably because this is a project that was taken up after mulitple revisions to the script and after it was scrapped by various directors since 1997. But I shall know after tonight when I watch it on IMAX IN 3D. I already know that Roger Ebert has given it a bad review, hope that I dont when I review it tomorrow.


TOMB RAIDER: LEGEND
On a smaller but completely different note, I managed to finish the new Tomb Raider game today. Named Tomb Raider: Legend, this 7th installment was a fun game to play, especially on the PC. I wouldnt call the game innovative as it heavily borrows elements from a multitude of action-adventure shooters. Lara Croft, the central character copies certain actions from the prince in Prince of Persia : The Sand's Trilogy and certain other skills from James Bond in Everything or Nothing. In other words, if you take the prince games and Everything or Nothing, step it down by a notch in every area, throw in a female lead character , you get your new Tomb Raider. But hey, that's not a really bad thing.

Even though the game is short (I beat it a little under 7 hours in medium difficulty), it takes you through various exotic locales around the globe, never losing it's pace once it builds. I would actually recommend it for a week's evening fun when you have finished playing the other games I just mentioned. Signing off, for now.. Will be back tomorrow with the new Superman review.

BLOODRAYNE MOVIE REVIEW

BLOODRAYNE
Let me let you all know this is not exactly a movie review. Reviewing my past blogs I certainly feel that I have made multiple references to this movie. And before your curiosity spikes making you want to watch the movie, let me tell you -" WAIT!!! BE PATIENT!". Now follows a bunch of reason why you should not.

"The whole universe is relative" - I think Einstein said that (maybe not). But relativity is what demarcates the good from the bad and thats a universal law. If it weren't for a scale of comparison society wouldnt exist the way it does now. Similarly every movie reviewer needs certain movies that define his or her scale of comparison. If you would consider movies like Godfather or Gladiator to be a 10 then according to my scale BloodRayne ranks a zero. Hence the reason why any bad elements in every movie is being compared with BloodRayne, my epitome of fim making catastrophy. This entry is just going to highlight those tragic reasons that forced me to sit through this Meecrob (a really bland Thai Crispy noodles). "Why do you call this a movie review then?", you may ask. Well it's because I have this cool photoshopped Movie review number photo and I just love to use it. So for no constructive reason I titled this entry "BloodRayne movie review".

Lemme quote what I wrote in my previous entry "I am a big gaming enthusiast and any movie adapted from a video game is always welcome ( Silent Hill is one such). Not because video game based movies are good (they are usually bad, sometimes even down-right horrible. Think Bloodrayne ), it's because they offer cheap thrills and immediately forgettable movie experiences...err, on a bigger budget". And thats the only reason why I saw it. BloodRayne too, like Silent Hill is based on a popular videogame. And let me confess, I have never played nor seen any of the BloodRayne videogames. All I know is that she carries two really huge swords and has a thirst for blood (I mean literally - only comparable with the voracious appetite of Obelix). Why is she so bloodthirsty? Because she is half-human, half-Vampire (very original).

The film actually pretends to have a plot but does a very poor job pretending. It centers on an attractive, supernatural huntress named Rayne (Kristina Loken), who is an unholy breed of human and vampire called a Dhampir. Trained by a secret agency called the Brimstone Society which hunts down and eliminates supernatural threats around the globe, Rayne is confronted by the deadliest of all creatures, the powerful and evil Kagan, King of the Vampires (Ben Kingsley). Yes, it's true! BloodRayne is a female Wesley Snipes running around during the time of the crusades. I am actually thinking really hard right now for another reason why I saw this film but my mind is as clean as an alien abductee's. My liking for videogames is soon going to be the death of me.

An early january release, a huge screw up by the production company while distributing prints to theatres (they were supposed to ship almost 2000 prints but they ended up sending it to theatres without booking them. Hence only a 1000 prints were screened) and the non-existence of a director screams BAD MOVIE to anyone bright enough to notice. So did I, but I didnt have the slightest idea I was about to watch the worst movie of all time.. OF ALL TIME!! Half way through the movie I simply had to pause, just to find out what IMDB had to say. And guess what? IMDB gave it a 2.4/10 rating. I sighed a wave of relief that I wasnt alone in my opinion. Ranked at 43 in IMDB bottom 100 list, i rejoiced at the fact that everyone in the world hated it. Finishing the movie was as arduous as curing brain tumor but I did manage to finish it.


Why is this movie sooooo bad? Because everything about the movie simply is. Acting, settings, Action..everything. But the person to actually blame was the non-existent director that I initially mentioned, Uwe Boll. Do you like videogames? Apparently this guy doesnt. Because of a personal chilhood trauma, he has taken it upon his shoulders to murder every videogame based film out there (I just made this up.. but who knows? It might be true). He dislikes them so much that every movie that he has virtually made and is about to make is based on one. So if have a videogame franchise that you really love and you always felt that it had the potential to turn into a great film, Uwe Boll is probably going to purchase all the rights and tear it to pieces right in front of your eyes. As far as I know neither Halo or Half Life will find their way into his hands but other franchises.. BEWARE! Going through his IMDB profile i just found that none of his movie have crossed the 3.5/10 rating, most of them remaking history by finding spots on the bottom 100 list. It is indeed a big conundrum how he manages to find enough money to bankroll all his fiendish operations. If anyone out there likes Dungeon Siege, Far Cry or Postal you might as well start crying now, because it will share the same fate as that of House of the Dead, Alone in the dark or BloodRayne.

I know I should give this film a zero but there were some people who spent almost 20 million dollars making it and wasted a lot of time which could have been constructively spent on wicker basket weaving. Hence I shall give it a 2. So in the words of Mr. Mackey, the South Park school counselor, I would just like to say - "Hope you havn't seen BloodRayne. BloodRayne's bad M'kay". - {BATMAN^V^EXILED}

Movie Links

BloodRayne's Official Page

BloodRayne's IMDB Page

BloodRayne's Trailers

SILENT HILL MOVIE REVIEW

SILENT HILL
Never have I been a fan of the horror movie genre. Lately, its been peppered with low budget, raunchy, teen-slasher flicks offering cheap thrills and immediately forgettable movie experiences. So it was a big surprise to me that I found myself watching this movie in theatre. Thinking back I know why. There were three simple reasons that encouraged me to watch this film. Reason No.1 was a friend named Zoheb, a big horror movie fan, to whom I hardly say no. Reason No.2 was the fact that there was no other movie to watch (No! I did not intend to see RV. Actually my friends and I sneaked into another screen and saw the first 10 mins before Silent hill started. Man! was it horrible.) Reason No.3 is that I am a big gaming enthusiast and any movie adapted from a video game is always welcome ( Silent Hill is one such). Not because video game based movies are good (they are usually bad, sometimes even down-right horrible. Think Bloodrayne ), it's because they offer cheap thrills and immediately forgettable movie experiences...err, on a bigger budget. Just to raise my expectations I even tried my hand at Silent Hill 4 - The Room. After an hour of play I was dissapointed with every aspect of the game - the gameplay, the controls, even the scares. It even slightly managed to hamper my decision to see the movie, but only slightly. If anyone shared these thoughts that I had, it is obvious one wouldnt expect much out of a movie like Silent hill and neither did I. But this movie proved me wrong. It's been almost two months since I have seen this movie and I still manage to recollect every scene.

Silent Hill opens with a young girl, a sleepwalking Sharon (Jodelle Ferland) being pursued by her mother, Rose (Radha Mitchell) and father, Christopher Da Silva (Sean Bean). Constantly uttering, dreaming and drawing about Silent Hill (a small ghost town in West Virginia), Rose is forced to drive the disillusioned Sharon to the very place that fuels her nightmares. Seems like the correct thing to do, right? Against the will of her husband, Rose drives down to Silent Hill only to be pursued by a suspecting police officer, Cybil Bennet (Laurie Holden), on a bike. Not pulling over for the officer, hot pursuit soon ensues only to be suddenly interupted by the ghostly figure of small girl walking in the middle of the road. A scenario like this in horror movies can only mean one thing - Slamming hard on the brakes equals an accident and as a result Rose soon loses consiousness. After waking up she soon finds herself on the outskirts of silent hill and to add to her already existing trauma, her daughter is nowhere to be found. Stepping out of her SUV, Rose is greeted by a town covered with fog and falling ash, painting a surreal look the likes of which can be compared with the scene where Tom Cruise is woken from the footpath by Penelope Cruz in Vanilla Sky. The atmosphere alone gives away a lot of clues to movie watchers who pay attention to trivial details. Rose soon rushes into the town hoping to find her daughter and starts pursuing an ever evasive young girl who resembles her daughter. Following her down a stairwell, the sound of a siren falls on her ears soon followed by a thick viel of darkness. The darkness changes the whole outlook of Silent Hill from the gloomy and foggy town to one filled with blood and rust, reflecting the visions that Sharon had about Silent Hill. Out of the darkness emerges disfigured, charred children like figures with banshee like wails. After being swarmed by hundreds of them, Rose manages to fight them off long enough to survive the darkness. After losing consiousness once again (who wouldnt, in a scenario like that), Rose wakes up in the foggy, ash laden town once again. Coming across a huge chasm that detaches Silent Hill from the rest of the world, Rose meets the towns first resident, a craggy old lady who reeks the appearance of a person who might have been the towns only resident for years. Unable to get any answers from the old lady about the whereabouts of her daughter, Rose calls her husband only to pick up static at both ends. But thank god her husband is intelligent enough to assume that something has gone wrong, taking it upon his shoulders to go look for Rose. Rose then runs back to her SUV only to be arrested by Cybil, whose bike too has crashed into the girders during the previous night. Soon after the arrest, the siren sounds once again followed by the familiar darkness. Out of the ashen depths emerge new figures that slowly start advancing toward them...

Intrigued? So was I after this point. It's rather hard to explain the plot behind Silent Hill without possibly retelling the whole movie. In short the film is actually the tragic story of a young girl named Alessa who is wrongly accused by the citizens of her own town, Silent Hill, as a witch. But while burning poor Alessa at the stake the fire spreads destroying the whole town before dying out. Barely rescued at the very last minute by a local police officer and suffering from severe burns, an almost lifeless Alessa is rushed to a hospital where she longs for unleashing her vengeance upon those who wronged her. Her prayers are soon answered by someone who grants Alessa enough powers to vent out her anger in destructive ways. Thirty years later Alessa uses Sharon and Rose as instruments in her grand plan of retribution.

Not being a fan of the video game franchise its hard for me to decide whether Silent Hill remained faithful to its source. But I do know that it borrows heavily from the first two games and most of the soundtracks used in the film are directly lifted from the games themselves. And what do you know the music fits every frame of the film like a glove. But two aspects of the movie that have to be commended are the visuals and production design. The ambience that every scene is painted with couldnt be presented on a better scale. In this era ruled by CGI, it is actually quite hard to believe that most of what you see actually existed in flesh on the set. It seems they used dancers to perform complex, grotesque moves that were necessary to portray the monsters that roam Silent Hill. Some of the visuals along with the lighting were so well done anyone is bound to be spellbound while looking at it. The scene where Cybil is being lowered while tied to a ladder is still vividly etched in my mind after a period of two months. The movie does possess its fair share of blood and violence but the gore is never felt. Giving the audience a sense of creepiness instead of fear, Silent Hill feels more like an M.Night Shyamalan film than anything else. When it comes to performances not much can be said- it's just that the story is so convoluted it doesnt allow room for any of the actors to enact their characters.

The Story of Silent Hill explores a lot of debatable subjects like Metaphysics and religion. Comprehension is often conflicted with questioning when one faces subjects dealing with space-time continuities, parallel dimensions/realities, concept of heaven and hell or even the existence of an anti-god. But it is best if we do not question the various scenarios that Silent Hill throws at us and assume that the possibilities are endless. Questioning every aspect would probably lead to a very pointless movie experience. Even after this, at the end of the movie the viewer cant help but leave with a lot of questions unanswered. A few may find it frustrating because of the bad aftertaste but if you followed the events closely, you might probably understand everything that just transpired onscreen. If you ask me I would ask you to see Silent Hill for this very reason- just to know your interpretation of this movie. - {BATMAN^V^EXILED}

Movie Links

Silent Hill's Official Page

Silent Hill's IMDB Page

Silent Hill's Trailers

SUPERMAN RETURNS WEBSITE HACKED

SUPERMAN RETURNS
Let me start this entry by letting you know that this is not a movie review - just a small piece of information that I would like to share. Since the beginning of may I had been slightly perturbed by the lack of marketing for Superman Returns. Speculations began to float around about the quality of the movie. A few of us assumed that WB had this huge dud on their hands and they didnt want to waste any more money marketing a sure flop. And then came a sudden influx of trailers, photos on pepsi bottles, unwanted critisicm by the media, crowds lining up in front of theatres a week before release,etc etc and a wave of relief hit me. Nowhere close to the publicity campaign conducted by The Da Vinci Code but enough to create a hype nonetheless. There is some life left in this franchise after all.

Anyway back to the issue at hand - Thanks to an interview with Kevin Spacey (who plays Superman's arch nemesis Lex Luthor in the new movie) on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno I learnt that he used to torture superman (or in other words, the newcomer Brandon Routh) by stooping to irritating antics. It seems that he drove a suped-up anti-superman golf cart around the set while yelling superman must die all the while. His antics, not surprisingly has found its way onto the information superhighway. You would soon realize what Superman/Brandon Routh had to put up with once you take a look at what Lex Luthor did to the new Superman Returns site.

P.S - Superman Returns is also releasing in Imax Theatres worldwide, certain segments of the movie being presented in 3D. - {BATMAN^V^EXILED}

Movie Links

Superman Returns's Official Page

Superman Return's IMDB Page

Superman Return's Trailers

MISSION IMPOSSIBLE 3 MOVIE REVIEW

M:I:III
** SPOILER ALERT ** How would you feel if you wanted to see a summer blockbuster but ended up watching a powerpoint presentation instead? Not just a normal presentation, but one that runs for two hours and transitions from one slide to another in twenty minute intervals. Yes I know, I would be pretty steamed about it too. And thats exactly how I felt while watching Mission impossible 3 . Deception and trickery has always been the name of the game when it comes to any MI movie plotline but I soon realized, this time it also applies to the audience. I am so furious right now (Somebody robbed me of my 6 bucks!!!) that I have decided to show you the whole movie right here on this small blog. "Isin't that piracy?", you may ask. Well, you be the judge.

Hi! I am Ethan Hunt and this is my team of super cool agents trying to rescue the girl in blue. BTW she is an agent too.

Oops!! Didnt realize she had a bomb in her head. "Guys, if she dies it will be yet another failed mission. Oh wait! Yeah, she's dead."

She said something about one of my bosses working with the bad guy before she died, but hey!! Arent all bosses bad guys in cliche spy movie plotlines?

Well I know I failed my mission but I dont care because I am so much in love with my newly wed wife. WOOHOO! I AM IN LOVE!

Somebody warned me that its dangerous for agents to marry but I have the feeling this is going to be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.

"Well agents, another chance for us to screw up. It seems we have to climb the vatican wall, shown on the left and capture the guy, shown below."

"I know he looks fat and all but mark my words, he is an evil overlord. If we dont apprehend him in time, he might get hold of the Rabbit's foot. I dont know what that is but I am sure it's worse than Athletes foot."

Hey guess what? We didnt screw up and all we had to do was blow up a gallardo. "Mission well executed, agents. Super qool poses for the production photo."

Oops! I spoke too soon. The guy's escaping. Guess we screwed up this one too. lol.

"OK, OK! I am sorry I asked. You can have him."

"HEY I SAID I AM SORRY. HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY IT?"

It seems that the bad guy not only escaped but he kidnapped my wife too. How could this happen? Now I have to go to Shangai and get the Rabbit's foot for him.

Can you see those tall buildings in the background. I have to slingshot myself from one tall building to another and land on the roof of the other building perfectly so that I can slide down the slope and take out all the guards while sliding down and .... or in other words it involves a complex break-in plan like the other MI's. Hey, you cant make an MI movie without a break-in, can you?

I still dont know how I managed to get the Rabbit's foot (actually nobody knows.. hehe) but I got my parachute entangled with a truck on my way back. Rofl! How did I manage to get this job in the first place?

Oh! it's my other boss who is working with the bad guy. He tried to make me steal the Rabbit's foot for him. Aaah! Now it makes perfect sense.

Bang!!! Bang!!! Take that, all you bad guys. You too, Boss.

Thank god! my wife is safe and the bomb in my head stopped ticking. I still dont know what the Rabbit's foot is but lets all just go home.

Need I say more? Ok, i guess I have to. Though the action sequences abetted the movies chances of doing well at the box office every other aspect spoilt it. To top it all the movie degrades itself by interlacing the non existent plotline with a love story. Though a lot of critics called this movie the best in the franchise, in my opinion it holds nothing special. Neither does it have the drama that fuelled MI or the brash style that complimented MI 2. Trying to mix elements from both movies, MI 3 ends up tasting like a caramel custard sauteed with peas and onions.

Calling it the closest to the MI series its no surprise that critics liked it but I have never seen the series. Hence, I am going to assume that the series too was written by monkeys. Finally, you start feeling like the mouse (see first photo), trying to pick the good elements from a movie so bad that only one thought keeps resurfacing: mission impossible.

But its MI and it does have an international appeal. I was intially surprised at the fact that the local theatre at Kalamazoo,MI recorded a majority of international audiences, but only intially. I guess all the Tom cruise bashing topped the fanfare to keep most of the American crowds indoors. But not to worry, those who havent seen the movie.... Oh! what am I saying? You just finished seeing the movie right here. The generous person that I am, I shall only charge you five dollars for this online screening. My address is in my profile. Feel free to mail your checks any time you wish. - {BATMAN^V^EXILED}

Movie Links

M:I:III's Official Page

M:I:III's IMDB Page

M:I:III's Trailers